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I was just giving advice regarding how to be a caregiver to someone this week and communication as well being loyal to the person you’re caring for were two of the main points mentioned. What I’m pretty sure does not count as loyalty is that if the person you’re caring for is your wife, going out and getting a girlfriend on the side. Then if you’re going to do it, choosing to go public about it. Well that’s what happened in the case of Dan Gasby, media executive, known mostly for being the husband of the famous model and restauranteur B Smith.
B Smith announced in the summer of 2014 that she had been diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimers. From then on it wasn’t long before her husband Dan found someone else to see, Alexandra Lerner, 53 who herself ironically happens to be separated and with children of her own. Dan and Alexandra went on Dr. Oz recently to discuss their relationship and the public backlash they’ve been receiving which has included death threats.
“What a lot of people don’t understand about Alzheimer’s [is that] B. now is really like a 4-year-old.. like a toddler in an adult body and can’t take care of herself at all,” she said. “She needs 24-hour care.”
While taking care of is sick wife undoubtedly is a stressful thing to do, a little omitted fact here is that he has a reported net worth of $3 million and she has $300 million. We’re certain he could hire a caretaker that could alleviate some of the stress that’s been leading him to think about cheating. Another interesting tidbit is that Alex lives with the couple when she isn’t in her Manhattan home.
“All the ones that know B. are extremely supportive, extremely supportive, have no problems with it,” Gasby said. “The people, because she’s a celebrity, a personality quote, unquote, they weigh in, and what they do is they attach what they feel B. would. They attach their feelings as ‘Well, B. doesn’t know. She wouldn’t want this.’ Well, if B. knew, I wouldn’t be with Alex because she wouldn’t have Alzheimer’s.”
This all started after the Washington Post profiled his living arrangements earlier in the month which is what’s lead to the death threats. People have even gone as far as saying he needed to be arrested because he was abusing his wife. A Youtube vlogger said “[Lerner’s] having her lifestyle funded by a black woman, and this white woman didn’t have to build a thing with you,” in a video that amassed over 20,000 views.
“I mean, we’ve had death threats,” he told Dr. Oz. “I mean, we’ve had people just do all kind of crazy things. They’ve never been to our restaurants. We don’t know them. They make all kind of racial innuendos.”
Life is messy and with that being said, most people keep the messy parts to themselves for reasons like this. Dan seems to not understand the significance of what he’s doing. His wife is a cultural icon in the black community. Cheating on her is pretty much seen as cheating on the community as a whole. Essence Magazine has already done a piece saying she deserves better. Who wakes up in the morning and decides to make a public anouncement showing off their side chick to the world while still married to a person with Alzheimers? Then he’s allowing the girlfriend to take care of his wife. That’s just plain disrespectful.
While death threats are beyond the pale, he deserves the backlash he’s receiving. There is such a thing called til death do us part that tends to get overlooked. But then again his girlfriend was married to a man who went to jail for 15 years in self-defense fighting a man in a restaurant who actually killed him from the blow of his fist, first leaving him brain dead. She left him as soon as soon as he went off to prison. The only logical explanation to this is that they’re shopping around for a reality show. Even then it really isn’t in good taste what he’s doing, but to each his own.
Glitzers, do you agree with B Smith’s husband dating another woman while she has Alzheimers and allowing the woman to take care of him?
Photo Credit: Rob Rich/WENN.com
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