Photo Credit: Nick Cannon/Instagram
Nick Cannon, who was just hospitalized with pneumonia couldn’t even focus on getting better because it was the same time of year he lost a newborn son of his last year to brain cancer. Zen, who was just 5 months old at the time unfortunately succumbed to brain cancer. He referred to the experience with the son he had with model and influencer Alyssa Scott as “the toughest day of my life” in a new Instagram post.
“Physically I’m definitely on the mend but Mentally and Spiritually I’m broken. Been tossing and turning all night, and as much as I know I need rest, last night I couldn’t sleep at all. I can’t believe it’s been a year already since the toughest day of my life occurred. Such a painful anniversary. Losing a child has to be the heaviest, most dark and depressive experiences that I will never get over. A mixture of guilt, pain, and sorrow is what I suppress daily.”
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He went on to discuss how others have viewed him and the relationships he’s been in in recent years saying, “I am far from perfect and often fall short and make decisions in my life that many question, but anyone who knows me knows my heart. I love hard, I love big, and I love with my entire Heart and Soul and I just wish my Little Man could’ve felt more of that love while he was here on Earth. One of my spiritual leaders recently told me that I am in the midst of one of the most challenging seasons of my life, but encouraged me to be steadfast and know that all of this will only make me stronger, and to not lean on my own understanding but to rely on the peace that surpasses all.”
He touched on his recent bout with pneumonia reinsuring everyone that he’s doing fine adding, “But let me tell you, it’s tough… I know a few days ago I wrote a post from my hospital bed saying I will be okay and I just needed rest so don’t waste your prayers on me but I can definitely use those prayers right now… Continue to Peacefully Rest My Son, Zen Scott Cannon. We Love you Eternally.”
And ironically, despite what happened to their child that didn’t make it, Scott is currently pregnant with another child with him. We’re not sure if this is number 12, 13 or what but whatever the case is, we’re happy that they’re happy. Now one person that would be happier if he adjusted his fatherly duties is ex-wife Mariah Carey who sources close to the All I Want for Christmas Is You singer have said she wishes he could carve out more time for their twins. While Cannon thinks it’s wonderful having all of these children, it clearly has to be frustrating for the mothers watching him become increasingly less available to spend time with their children. And the $3 million he’s spending annually on child support can only go so far.
