Photo Credit: Paris Jackson/Instagram
Paris Jackson, daughter of Michael Jackson, born into the lap of luxury is probably the last one would think to have any self-esteem issues or bouts of depression but that’s exactly what she revealed in her Facebook Watch docuseries Unfiltered: Paris Jackson & Gabriel Glenn. From body image struggles to self-harm, she’s had quite the tumultuous 22 years.
“I was the only girl of four boys for the first 10, 11 years of my life,” Paris recalled. “Because I was the only girl, my dad loved playing dress-up. I looked like a porcelain doll and I hated it.”
After her father passed, she turned to food for comfort while living with Katherine Jackson. “Food became an addiction and then a cousin called me fat so I was like, ‘OK, I can’t do that anymore.’ And that’s how I fell into self-harm,” she shared. “I would cut and burn myself,” Paris revealed. “I never thought that I would die from it because I was always in control of the razor and I knew how deep I was going.”
She explained her level of addiction to things not drug related as chasing a dopamine high. “There’s a lot of things that cause a dopamine release. Self-harm was one of them, tattoos was one of them and so there was that and then also it was a distraction from emotional pain and transferring to physical pain and the need for control.” And she admitted, “Yes, I tried to kill myself many times.”
She went to a therapeutic boarding school in 2013 following a suicide attempt. A 2017 Rolling Stone interview revealed that she was driven there because of low self-esteem and “thinking that I couldn’t do anything right, not thinking I was worthy of living anymore.”
Jackson checked herself into rehab early last year stating “Yes I’ve taken a break from work and social media and my phone because it can be too much sometimes,” she wrote on Instagram, “and everyone deserves a break, but I am happy and healthy and feeling better than ever!”
During her recent docuseries episode she explained, “When I first got into the fashion world I didn’t understand that I couldn’t be myself all the time.”
“I still struggle to accept myself but that’s what I want to influence. I want to influence self-acceptance and courage and being comfortable in your own skin. I’m just working on content, trying to be content. Baby steps. Self-love is f–king hard.”
We have to mention that Paris Jackson is reported to be worth $100 million. That’s on par with major celebrities who have worked their a**es off years older than her which proves that money doesn’t always buy happiness. She has a promising modeling and acting career and perfectly set for a career in Hollywood which makes this both so sad to see and almost hard to understand. When she tattooed herself during quarantine, I have to admit it caused me to raise my eyebrow because that’s just a little odd behavior, and I see I was right. I just pray that she finds some peace soon and learns to count her blessings. She has plenty to be thankful for.
